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savvyliterateI just got done reading ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
ropachan's latest entry about Valentine's Day. I left her a reply, and I'm sorry, Ropa-chan, but I felt pretty offended.
It sounds like that I'm not allowed to feel sad or lonely during this time of year. Gah, I can't just turn my feelings off like a water faucet, you know. Do I ask to feel this way? NO. I prefer the perky, cheerful person I normally am. When I feel this come on, I do my best to avoid it or to push it away. So instead of denying what I feel, I'm acknowledging it. Because by doing so, I am able to feel better and keep on going.
And it's not the only time of year that I feel sad or guilty about being single. Every time I go to a family gathering now, I feel like the ugly duckling. Both of my brothers are married...(well, semi-married in Chris' case) and have kids. Both of my stepbrothers are married. If my mom marries Ronnie, two of his kids are married with kids while the third I never see. Granted, over the past couple of years, I've gotten over feeling this way. I've been able to geninuely feel glad spending time with my family. But during times like at Christmas, when all the families and couples have formed their little knots and are cooing over presents, etc., with each other, it is very easy to feel like the fifth wheel.
My parents are already hinting (okay, in Dad's case, blantantly suggesting) that it is time for me to be getting married. I'm old enough, I'm established in my career, I'm dealing with this pesky little money problem. Do I want a boyfriend? Yes and no. It's a complicated matter and one I have a feeling I'll be laughed or chastized at if I mention it.
Let's celebrate romance! Fine! I LOVE ROMANCE. If I didn't, do you think I could write those WAFF fics under my name on FF.net? There's a difference between celebrating it and trivilizing it. More people tend to do the latter than the former.
::fume::
ropachan's latest entry about Valentine's Day. I left her a reply, and I'm sorry, Ropa-chan, but I felt pretty offended.It sounds like that I'm not allowed to feel sad or lonely during this time of year. Gah, I can't just turn my feelings off like a water faucet, you know. Do I ask to feel this way? NO. I prefer the perky, cheerful person I normally am. When I feel this come on, I do my best to avoid it or to push it away. So instead of denying what I feel, I'm acknowledging it. Because by doing so, I am able to feel better and keep on going.
And it's not the only time of year that I feel sad or guilty about being single. Every time I go to a family gathering now, I feel like the ugly duckling. Both of my brothers are married...(well, semi-married in Chris' case) and have kids. Both of my stepbrothers are married. If my mom marries Ronnie, two of his kids are married with kids while the third I never see. Granted, over the past couple of years, I've gotten over feeling this way. I've been able to geninuely feel glad spending time with my family. But during times like at Christmas, when all the families and couples have formed their little knots and are cooing over presents, etc., with each other, it is very easy to feel like the fifth wheel.
My parents are already hinting (okay, in Dad's case, blantantly suggesting) that it is time for me to be getting married. I'm old enough, I'm established in my career, I'm dealing with this pesky little money problem. Do I want a boyfriend? Yes and no. It's a complicated matter and one I have a feeling I'll be laughed or chastized at if I mention it.
Let's celebrate romance! Fine! I LOVE ROMANCE. If I didn't, do you think I could write those WAFF fics under my name on FF.net? There's a difference between celebrating it and trivilizing it. More people tend to do the latter than the former.
::fume::
